


belated admissions

by lynne_jb



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Love, Love Triangles, Pining Clarke, Post Season 5, Sharing a Bed, based on that shitty fire promo pic, bell's so whipped but he doesn't even know it yet, finally admit they love each other, jason not gonna feed us, possible future smut, season 6, speculative season six, we feed outselves, we gotta get through the hiatus
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-07
Updated: 2018-10-07
Packaged: 2019-07-27 21:08:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,745
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16227356
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lynne_jb/pseuds/lynne_jb
Summary: He never told her how he felt and she realized she loved him too late... Now, Bellamy is with someone else and Clarke has to cope with this new relationship in the moments of peace on their new planet.A speculative fic centered around what we know hence far about The 100 Season 6, exploring mainly the relationship between Bellamy and Clarke. Knowing our showrunner (cough cough), we'll never be fed this well but please enjoy!![Rated Teen & Up for now, but the rating will probably go higher later into the fic]





	belated admissions

**Author's Note:**

> Based on the promo pic released at NYCC of Echo, Bellamy, and Clarke at the fire on the beach. A positive spin on that dreadful picture (seriously wtf was that?!) This will probably be multiple chapters... Do I know how long it will be? Hell no... Do I know where this is headed? A little bit. But if you enjoy, be sure to leave a comment and be on the lookout for more chapters!!
> 
> Inspired by @bellarkefeel on Twitter, this hopefully will make the hiatus more tolerable!
> 
> My twitter is @blakesbbyy :)

The flickers from the small fire possessed an unpredictability as they rose upwards. Despite having two suns, the absence of the daylight made the foreign environment entirely too cold. Clarke, Bellamy, Echo, Murphy and a few others had been the first to touch down upon the new planet of the remnants of their society. They had decided to scope out the area, as well as make contact with the descendants of Eligius III who’d supposedly built a society on the surface. So far, all they’d encountered was nature.

The new planet had the semblance of earth-like qualities, but Clarke was entirely certain they’d be met with one challenge or another. In her experience, it had always happened in that fashion. Peaceful moments between the savagery. Light peaking out beneath the dark. Monty and Harper’s message had been playing on repeat in Clarke’s mind since her moment with Bellamy on the bridge. Despite all their differences, that moment had contained a mutual peace and understanding. It felt as though they were finally on the same page again.

But now that Bellamy had reunited with Echo, Clarke felt it— that unspoken tension between the three, the one that made her feel like Bellamy had never truly come back from the ring. Not the Bellamy she knew, at least. The day had been trying to say the least. She’d always known that Bellamy’s heart belonged to Echo, but now she had to witness it with her own eyes. The first kiss felt like a dream like it wasn’t real. The second was a fluke. The moments she used to share with him were gone. She spent her years down on Earth waiting for a life with him and he’d spent his years in the Ring learning to live a life without her. It was understandable he would fall in love with someone else up there. Clarke was dead in his eyes and it wasn’t as though Clarke ever shared her feelings for him. He had never done the same but deep down she knew. But they never had the timing right. She could tell there were times where he was so close to just blurting it out, but she had stopped him. 

Whenever Bellamy would stand next to her today, scouting out their trail to the nearest civilization, Echo was right there with him. She felt like a third wheel, but more than that she felt… jealous.

Clarke Griffin, the Commander of Death. Jealous. She hadn’t felt that emotion since she was a bright-eyed teenager, falling in love with Finn when they’d first touched down. But that wrenching feeling in her gut was undeniable any time her eyes happened upon the pair. She tried to avert her eyes at times, entirely committing herself to take in their new home. 

But now, as the sun had finally set over the horizon and their fire began exuding heat, it was hard to concentrate on anything but. A few of them had settled around the small fire. Bellamy and Echo were cozied up, their limbs tangled, hands intertwined and looking incredibly domestic. Clarke hoped her face wasn’t too telling. She hoped it wouldn’t reveal her well-kept secret. And when her eyes locked with Bellamy, she almost felt him tense up in Echo’s arms. Their shared glance almost seemed to stop time. Clarke’s lower lip quivered and she couldn’t take any more of it. Forget the fire, she needed to be alone.

She abruptly stood, gathering attention from the rest of the group. They all raised their heads to look at who had broken the tranquility but quickly resumed to their respective hushed conversations. Clarke receded to the bank, where she found a seat upon a rock that overlooked the glistening water. It was a contemplative setting and Clarke found it to be the perfect milieu to clear her mind. _New planet, new problems. Focus, Clarke. Focus_.

However, she was only alone for a moment before she heard the shuffling of the sand as footsteps approached. Clarke didn’t need to look up to know who it was, but she did. Bellamy’s seemed worried as he walked toward her, a crest forming between his brows and a soulful look in his eyes. Her eyes were hooded as they met his, not quite sure what to say or do as he sat beside her. She couldn’t meet his eyes, not when he was so close. And she remained silent, thinking it would be better not to say what was on her mind at the moment. So he spoke up first.

“Clarke…” She swallowed hard, tears glistening just slightly in her eyes his voice came out in a hushed whisper. She turned, but only for a second before turning back the view of the lake. Their friends’ conversation was distant, a muted hum of voices which had become slightly more animated and the slight breeze gave her chills. She refused to look back into his chocolate eyes. It would make what she was about to say all the more difficult.

“I spent the better part of six years waiting for you to come back down to the ground. In a way, I feel like you’ve never truly come back…” She shook her head at how stupid she sounded, voicing what she shoulder have weeks ago— no, 125 years ago. She knew she was precariously close to dangerous, uncharted territory. “I’ve messed up, Bellamy. A lot. And I’m sorry.” There was a silence between the two and Clarke dared to shift her gaze toward him. He was already looking at her, a conflicted look on his face.

“I was so angry at you for leaving me there, Clarke. I’d lost you to so many things before. War, politics, time, guilt,” he listed off, rambling slightly. It was odd for Clarke to witness, she’d never seen him like this before. “But that time I’d lost you because of something I did. You told me to use my head and heart. I understand why you left me, but the worst part about it was that I thought you didn’t care anymore. I mean, six years passed. A lot changed— our priorities included— and after everything we’ve been through… I thought you didn’t care whether I lived or died.”

“Bellamy—” She tried to interject, her eyes glistening with tears. She wanted to tell him just how _much_ she cared. How the thought of him got her through the worst days. How she didn’t realize just how important he was to her until she lost him for six years. But he didn’t let her. 

“Madi told me about the radio calls, Clarke,” he blurted in admission.

At that, her head shot up from the piece of sand she’d fixated on earlier, filled with shock. She shook her head in disbelief, not able to process what he’d just said. Her eyebrows tugged to the center of her forehead, her eyes now glistening with tears.

“It wasn’t until I heard that… that I realized that you still cared about me. And that’s why I forgive you, Clarke. We’ve all done terrible things with good intentions. And this was no different. You did what you had to do to protect Madi. I realized that just because you left didn’t mean I could assume to know how you felt.”

“We’ve been through a lot together, you and I…” Clarke whispered with a humorless laugh at the way she was repeating her words from six— _no— a hundred thirty-one years ago_. He seemed to remember her words which granted her comfort (little did she know how much that conversation lingered in his head for the first year or so on the Ring). 

“I never told you this, but I don’t think I ever truly got over your death, Clarke. You should have been on the Ring with us. If you were, maybe…” Bellamy stopped abruptly, suddenly realizing what he was about to say.

Clarke solely nodded, a small smile forming on her face. There was a silent understanding between the two and he moved to kiss her forehead. They were back on the same page and Clarke leaned into his body, enveloped in the heat as she rested her head on his shoulder. His arm wrapped around her, pulling her into him. There was no more they needed to say. They could go on and on, but most the conversation was silent, as it always had been. Deeper meaning passed between words, wordless acknowledgments of how much they meant to each other without being blatantly obvious. Everything was as it had always been, and Clarke hoped she could move past her jealousy. She and Bellamy were friends. That’s all they’d ever be and she came to a silent acceptance of that thought. 

 

❂   ☾   ❂ 

 

Clarke receded into the tent she shared with Murphy and Emori, snuggling into her humble sleeping bag on the floor. The majority of the camp was still out by the fire, sharing stories and predictions for this new planet. Clarke wasn’t in the mood for such activities, emotionally drained for the night.

When Bellamy sat down at the fire, inquiring where Echo was, he was told by Emori that she’d gone back into her tent. He nodded, joining her moments later. She was laid down in her sleeping bag, alone in the tent, but awake. A soft smile came to Bellamy’s face as he kneeled down to grab his own blankets. Bellamy laid opposite her, sensing something was wrong in her eyes. His head rested on his arm as he looked at her contemplatively. 

“Clarke,” Echo started, her voice raspy as though she hadn’t spoken in ages. “Did you love her before you went up to the Ring?” Echo recalled the months he’d spent distraught over her death, hardly wanting to talk to anyone and blaming himself for her death. 

The room was silent and filled with tension for a moment before he answered. “Yes,” he admitted briefly. Echo’s lips pursed, her fears fulfilled. She deigned to ask another question.

“Do you still?”

He never answered, but she knew the answer. Echo just nodded and cuddled into his body for the night as though nothing had happened. Perhaps it was her way of acquainting herself to the new information. Sleep came easily for her, but Bellamy’s eyes weren’t able to close until much later, his mind haunted by the fact he’d answered the question Echo asked back on the Ring.

 

 

_ TO BE CONTINUED… _

**Author's Note:**

> Be sure to leave a like/comment. If you have any suggestions, feel free to comment/contact me on twitter: blakesbbyy !! :)


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